Arm Yourself...The Battle is On

Lies can be powerful.

They can destroy your sense of self. They can manipulate your perspective on life or a situation. They can alter your behavior, take over your mind, and ultimately change who you are.

I've struggled with believing lies for most of my life. Not only about who I am, but also about what I've done. I carry my past with me, it changes how I live my life for today, and places immense amount of fears and doubts about my future. Here are just some of the lies...

• I don't have the emotional strength to keep fighting through my depression.
• I am alone.
• My sin and brokenness are too deep and serious to ever come back from and find wholeness again.
• God is disappointed and ashamed of me.
• I must be ALL things for ALL people.
• I must be perfect. Perfectionism is key for God and others to love me.
• The hurt and pain will never go away.

I could go on and on. Believing these things in my heart and mind have been crippling and have kept me from truly living out a life of victory and joy through Jesus Christ.

Until last fall, I'm not sure where I came up with this idea, if someone told me about it or if I read about it somewhere. I started a Lie/Truth Journal. I thought...What's the #1 thing that can fight the lies in our head? TRUTH! And where is the #1 place where I can find infallible truth? GOD'S WORD...THE BIBLE! So I started this journal. Each day, I write down one lie that I believe about myself or my life. Then, I write down one truth or promise of God that I find in scripture that counters and tears down that specific lie. I can't tell you how much victory I have found in this! Yes, some days, I have the same lie that comes to mind, but what's great is I can look back through my journal and reread those truths. One day at a time, I am taking a lie and shoving it back in Satan's face saying "Not today, Satan!"

Lies can be powerful. But God's Word is the most powerful weapon we have.

Stand up. Arm yourself. The battle is on. Victory has already been won. Claim it.

Shattering Lies

I just got back from a weekend spiritual retreat in Outerbanks, NC with 35 other ladies in my Christian Leadership Training International class I have been taking over the last year. It was an incredibly powerful weekend where we felt the presence of the Holy Spirit seeping through every moment, song, teaching, and prayer. The Lord instilled in my heart that He understood why things happened the way they did in my last relationship. He reassured me that He loved me unconditionally. He gently whispered words of forgiveness to me over and over again, because He knows how much I need to hear it multiple times. He told me I will be redeemed, without a doubt. There are times when I doubt I will make it through this period in my life. I doubt I will be strong enough to move on; I doubt the wound will ever heal, and that the sadness will ever dissipate. But He told me, there is no doubt. "You will make it through, Lauren, trust Me...", He says. He even told me He will use my brokenness from this relationship to reach others. That made me think of this quote that keeps crossing my path of life numerous times; it's a quote from Pastor Rick Warren from his book The Purpose Driven Life: "Your greatest life messages and your most effective ministry will come out of your deepest hurts." That quote practically terrified me throughout all of 2014 every time I read it. I don't know if my deepest hurts will be used in public ministry or some other avenue, but I do know and accept the Lord will use it. He can and does bring goodness out of ALL things. (Romans 8:28).

One of the most powerful moments from the retreat was during a time of prayer when the retreat leaders asked us to stand up if we wanted to ask for the empowerment of the Holy Spirit. They went around the room, laid hands on individuals and prayed for them. I didn't feel called to stand up at this point in the retreat, but if the Lord has a message to tell you, He will find a way to speak it to you. The Pastor made her rounds and when she got to me, instead of passing by, she stopped, bent down, and told me the Lord spoke to her about me. Really? I had no clue what she was about say. She said that the Lord told her I will use the power and gift of discernment to call out the lies in people's lives and help them find the Truth to overcome those lies. She said I will use the strength and power I've had to overcome the lies in my own life to help others. God gave her a vision of me walking down a street with lies shattering like glass on my left and my right. She said that I would use this gift to reach many and to help them find healing.

Wow, Holy Spirit, wow. Speechless, and in awe of You....

God is Light

Seeing with God's Eyes

The following poem came out of the last book I read called Made for Goodness and Why This Makes All the Difference by Desmond Tutu and his daugther Mpho Tutu.

You are my child.
My beloved.
With you I am well pleased.
Stand beside me and see yourself.
Borrow my eyes so you can see perfectly.
When you look with my eyes then you will see
That the wrong you have done and the good left undone,
The words you have said that should not have been spoken,
The words you should have spoken but left unsaid,
The hurts you have caused,
The help you've not given
Are not the whole of the story of you.
You are not defined by what you did not achieve.
Your worth is not determined by success.
You were priceless before you drew your first breath,
Beautiful before dress or artifice,
Good at the core.